Sweptline.ORG

Took the family to our local fair and couldn't resist (C photo) . The little lady was so excited that I was wearing an oilfield shirt and showing interest in Obama. So I had to let her down gently.

Mike, which one is you?

Good one 2step

Txas2step wrote:Mike, which one is you?

mike your missing the suit. then you would look like a proper politician.

Why do cowboys curl up the sides of there hats?

So they can fit three of them in there Sweptline

One day, a doctor caved into desire versus common sense and had sex with a female patient. Afterwards, he felt tremendous guilt and had a great deal of remorse about it. He pondered his circumstance when a voice inside his head spoke up:

"Hey, you are a doctor, and you've done what thousands of doctors have. Don't be so glum about it! Move on with life!!!"

Another voice inside his head opted in...

"Hey Doc, are you insane? You are a veterinarian!"

John

A guy sits down at the bar and orders drink after drink.


"Is everything okay, pal?" the bartender asks.


"My wife and I got into a fight and she said she isn't talking to me for a month!"


Trying to put a positive spin on things, the bartender says,
"Well, maybe that's kind of a good thing. You know, ..a little peace and quiet?"


"Yeah. But today is the last day!"

What food reduces a woman's sex drive by 90% ?
.
.
.
.
.
.
Wedding Cake!

Difference between a wife and a girlfriend - 45 pounds
Difference between a husband and a boyfriend - 45 minutes

Difference between light and hard - u can sleep with the light on
Difference between dark and hard - it stays dark all night

pismopowerwagon wrote:Why do cowboys curl up the sides of there hats?

So they can fit three of them in there Sweptline

Why do cowboys all have the same size balls?

digdoug wrote:http://kpr.craigslist.org/grd/5355681189.html

Frozen when parked?...

John

So they can borrow each others horse trailer.

Wow digdoug you dragged that out for 3 days? Lol

Camping trip
>
>
>
> Ned was attending his Sweptline club's monthly meeting and had just told them
> he couldn't make the camping trip scheduled for the next day because his wife wouldn't let him go.
>
> After listening to the jeers and other derisive remarks from his fellow
> Swepty friends Ned left to go back home to his wife.
>
> When Ned's friends started arriving to set up camp the next day, who
> should be there but Ned sitting up in front of his truck, tent up,
> fishing rod in hand, camp oven roast stewing away in a hot bed of coals.
>
> "How did ya talk your wife into letting you go Ned?" "I didn't have to"
> was Ned's reply.
>
> "When I left the meeting I went home and slumped down in my chair with a beer to drown my sorrows. Then my wife snuck up behind me and covered my eyes and said, 'Surprise'!"
>
> When I peeled her hands back she was standing there in a beautiful see -through negligee and she said, "Carry me into the bedroom, tie me to the bed and you can do whatever you want."
>
> So here I am!

John

TWO GUYS IN LOWE'S
>>
>> Two guys, one old and one young, are pushing their carts around Lowe's
>> Building Supply when they collide.
>>
>> The old guy says to the young guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for
>> my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."
>>
>> The young guy says, "That's OK. It's a coincidence. I'm looking for my
>> wife, too. I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate."
>>
>> The old guy says, "Well, maybe we can help each other. What does your
>> wife look like?"
>>
>> The young guy says, "Well, she is 24 yrs old, tall, with blonde hair,
>> blue eyes, long legs, big boobs, and she's wearing tight white shorts, a
>> halter top, and no bra. What does your wife look like?"
>>
>> The old guy says...... "Doesn't matter --- let's look for yours."

Car Terminology ........ The joy of Daughters!

The daughter asks her Dad:
"Dad there is something that my boyfriend said to me that I didn't understand. He
said that I have a beautiful chassis, lovely airbags, and a fantastic bumper."

Her Dad said:

"You tell your boyfriend that, if he opens your hood and tries to check your oil
with his dipstick, I will tighten his lug nuts so hard that his headlights will pop out and he will start leaking oil out of his
exhaust pipe."

John